
I’m usually a healthy* eater and also pretty disciplined when it comes to what time I eat, and how much. This all changes when there’s free food, though, so cruises are all about the “free” food for me. I love it, lose all control, and have zero regrets during or after.
Which is why by inner voice starts saying some stuff that I only realize sounds insane in brief moments of clarity. Things like:
- “Should I get two appetizers?”
- “I think that crisp bacon just scratched the roof of my mouth — did I just get a bacon injury?”
- “The ice cream I had outside earlier today is better than this ice cream I’m eating right now”
- “That was a great First Lunch”
- 20 minutes later: “Should I eat my Second Lunch now?”
- 21 minutes later: “Hmmm, I wonder if the buffet is still open…”
- 30 minutes later: “I wonder if mac & cheese would be good on these nacho chips” (it is)
- 40 Minutes later: “I wonder what time we’re eating dinner tonight”
- “Maybe I’ll bring a slice of zucchini bread, a slice of lemon pound cake, and a cookie back to my room in case I get hungry right before I go to sleep tonight”
*Yes I know the proper term is “healthful”, but I hate using it. If you’e bothered by this…eat 💩 ♥️

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